http://ihatewow.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec?format=rss Tribe.net. Local Connections http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#f3dca767-cd36-41d1-aed8-20afd56f4c0a Fuck you justin. FUCK YOU. Go to hell man. I don't know why any women on earth would want to be with you. Fuck you. Ass hole Mon, 15 Jun 2009 22:38:47 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#f3dca767-cd36-41d1-aed8-20afd56f4c0a Valerie 2009-06-15T22:38:47Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#3883975d-9a3b-4ac7-b497-512cb2c2fae4 Amy, it sounds as though your husband is having an emotional affair with this other WoW player, I know it, I have been there. I am a 34 yr old female who is addicted to WoW. I have been in a relationship for 11 yrs and actually left my bf for 6 months because of the game. I started playing nightly with a guy and we had begun an emotional affair. If I was away from WoW, I would get grumpy and difficult to be around. After about playing with this person or over a year we decided to meet. I left my fiance of 10+ years to be with him. What a HUGE mistake that was. After kicking my WoW BF out, I thought to myself "wow this is great, I can play WoW whenever I want". Boy was I miserable. I am now back with my longtime BF, I realized that there was something missing in our relationship that I wasn't getting from him, so I turned to this game and the WoW guy, it was attention. I still play the game, but I know to spend my time also with my bf. Fri, 08 May 2009 17:46:02 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#3883975d-9a3b-4ac7-b497-512cb2c2fae4 Michelle 2009-05-08T17:46:02Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#34ea2872-f666-4847-acfc-be4552024e6e "write it down and attach it to the computer screen- big letters and not many words as men tend to be impatient when they want to play their games but a few words usually manage to sink in if they're written big enough... at least in my experience." You treat men like they're children and you wonder why he ignores you for a computer game? Sheesh talk about stupid woman. Fri, 08 May 2009 02:54:15 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#34ea2872-f666-4847-acfc-be4552024e6e Justin 2009-05-08T02:54:15Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#12122410-5d88-4f48-ab54-94da91ed2582 I did exactly the same thing, typing in "I hate wow" and got here. I have to say, my other half isn't quite as addicted as yours sounds, but addicted nonetheless. We've been together for about 3 years now and I know that if it ever came down to it in a choice between me or the game, I would certainly never win. I don't know if you have already, but you should probably try showing him something like what you posted here - write it down and attach it to the computer screen- big letters and not many words as men tend to be impatient when they want to play their games but a few words usually manage to sink in if they're written big enough... at least in my experience. Other than that I really don't know what to say as I've hit more or less the same wall as you. Thu, 07 May 2009 16:07:15 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#12122410-5d88-4f48-ab54-94da91ed2582 Jo 2009-05-07T16:07:15Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#5b2f9905-95cb-4c66-8a17-cdb25f55fda0 Okay let's say "WoW addiction" does exist (and it's not just that you're boring/controlling/nagging and the game is just fun...). So you're pregnant with this dude's kid and he's addicted to something. How's that any different from a woman having a kid with an alcoholic, or a crackhead? So therefore my sympathy for you if you insist on "WoW addiction" just flew out the window. On the other side of the coin, I don't believe there is such a thing as "WoW addiction". WoW is just fun. I play WoW instead of Half-Life because WoW is more fun than half-life. I take my girl out on weekends because going out for dinner is more fun than WoW. So tell me, what's wrong with you that your boyfriend would rather stay on a computer than hang out with you? Thu, 07 May 2009 12:58:43 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#5b2f9905-95cb-4c66-8a17-cdb25f55fda0 Justin 2009-05-07T12:58:43Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#7cf9dfb2-f22e-4cb4-9352-bac3c057bd9e My husband has left me because i told him he was addicted to the game.. married for 9 years.. 2 boys under the age of 5. he has become depressed.. he hates everything and anything about his real life. ever since i started asking him to spend less time on the game he has become angrier and angrier with me. He has no left and moved in with his dad who also plays the game. He says things to me i thought he would never say that arent true. He tells me he never loved me, he doesnt even miss me and he's always felt this way. I know that this isnt true.. every marraige has their problems but we had very minor problems until this game started consuming his life. He works nights and he plays 10 hours a night then on the weekends he plays at home 10 hours a night. HE used to play more until i told him it was affecting the children, that he was spending no time with them or me. This game has taken a 9 year marraige of the man i love completely away from me. He swears it's not the game.. he fights it's not the game, but the truth of the matter it is.. I've tried to get him counciling, tried to get him to watch movies, read books to make his real life more appealing to him.. He rejects anything to do with helping himself. He would rather live his life alone with this game and maybe some female companions that give him what i wasnt because he was spending all of his time in the game and refusing to spend any time with me. He continues to try to hurt me emotionally over and over again and it was never in his nature before to hurt anyone. Our children are suffering immensley first because they were pushed away for a game, and secondly because he has left us and abandoned us and even the kids thought he loved me. This is a shock to more people than you know.. They all saw that we were such a strong couple we could talk about anything, and he has completely pushed me out of his life. This hurts so bad, and anyone that is going through this i completely feel your pain! Mon, 20 Apr 2009 22:25:06 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#7cf9dfb2-f22e-4cb4-9352-bac3c057bd9e elizabeth maltais 2009-04-20T22:25:06Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#87bf882e-82ba-4cda-8bee-9329c2e31451 i am so glad i am not the only one suffering. i feel the same way as many of you do, my man has played since october 06 and is addicted. he had a business he had with 2 mates for about a year and a half and other than that he has NOT worked at all since we have been together (8 years engaged for last 2) . he spends all day at home playing this god damned game. i started to play too this last3 weeks, and i must admit i am enjoying it. it is addictive. but i can switch off when i have to and i also hold a decent job. i do all the housework too like others have stated. he does the dishes and a few odd jobs if i persist and ask alot. i have to because 'he forgets' i have to write things down before work so he does them but often wont get out his chair and see the notes......... he never calls me or texts me when i am away unless i demand it. i stay away from home 1 night a week every week. i have recently found out he has 1 special friend in warcraft and has had for the last 18 months. then i discover its another woman. he is a guildy who loves to raid so i have the whole...'commitment to others' dilemma aswell. problem is my man has always been a lazy unmotivated SOB. i love him to bits but since sinking deep into the game we have nothing at all in common. we were planning to start a family but when i went off the pill a few months ago he got cold feet and even stopped wanting to have sex. he feels scared, and useless to be a dad. i have ignored warcraft since he installed it because i thought if i disliked it and kept distance he wouldnt enjoy it as much,but since joining the game and taking a small interest in his wow life, i discover almost his whole guild treat him and HER like a couple. they are always together whenever he is signed in and she even called him her best friend. he neglected to tell me any of this 'because i dont like the game'. she treats him like a boyfriend, they text one another in rl, she text 'i miss you and cant wait to play with you' his reply 'im sorry for making you worry and hope you still want to play with me' he helps with any request she has, and even when he shit stirs someone, she is there backing him up like his sidekick. he told someone jokingly to put his balls in thier mouth and she said roll em around a bit. who the fuck is she to talk about MY mans balls. i said if she is just a friend then i want to meet her too we can all be friends, she told him she wouldnt be able to pretend to be my frined which to me means she feels guilty like a mistress. people know if they want his character in a raid, to ask her to join knowing that he will follow. he then admits that they have spoken about being to close to one another on 2 occasions already over the last 5 months and i made him do it a third time last week. they stillplay all hours every day. he is home right now levelling another charecter with her. he spends more time in that game than he does sleeping and i get a few hours attention each night when i get home from work. he enjoys the game and i think is the only thing in his life that makes im happy (besides me or so he says) and i feel like an absolute bitch for asking himno to play but i think his commitment to it is too much especially when he said she is 70% the reason he plays. the game would be boring without her. now he keeps telling me its nothing we are just friends, your making a mountain out of a mole hill. he keeps trying to comvince me its ok. i think he is trying to convince himself more than me. he has 1 month from now to get his shit sorted and her to either be just a friend or the game gone or us over. im dying inside. i really am. Wed, 01 Apr 2009 10:39:29 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#87bf882e-82ba-4cda-8bee-9329c2e31451 Amy 2009-04-01T10:39:29Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#5297c4c7-fdaa-41e0-930f-e1b4559a9fcc well, they created divorce for a reason Mon, 09 Feb 2009 20:48:55 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#5297c4c7-fdaa-41e0-930f-e1b4559a9fcc ELIMINATOR_99 2009-02-09T20:48:55Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#864c79f9-9dff-49d3-a055-3db8997fcb5f bet you never broke the 1700s Wed, 04 Jun 2008 14:12:27 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#864c79f9-9dff-49d3-a055-3db8997fcb5f james 2008-06-04T14:12:27Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#ea4fa74c-6da9-41ac-9bf8-5faeb2a4db3a And there was a mistake in my post - "I am advocating a boring life" should read "I am not advocating".... sheesh..... Wed, 04 Jun 2008 03:09:15 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#ea4fa74c-6da9-41ac-9bf8-5faeb2a4db3a Richard 2008-06-04T03:09:15Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#76b5f82c-d729-4591-b6c8-99b0b7fa0c33 John, I could be reading you wrong, but it sounds like you are saying "Well, if he is playing Warcraft, it's because you must be pretty boring..... so go and work on that, that will solve your problem". But is the problem really that one-sided? I stumbled across this site because, like a few other people, I typed "I hate Wow" in the google search - out of frustration really, because a lot of people have been telling me it's just a game.... but I know, deep down, however much I love playing, it is indeed a drug in disguise. Take your pick - television, alcohol, gambling, etc. The truth is that the human body is not designed to run on table sugar and chocolate, no matter how good it tastes. And we aren't built for this kind of excitement either, if it takes the place of a staple diet of friendship, companionship, and being around for our kids. I am advocating a boring life. What I am saying is that there are many, many people who cannot handle video games with any sort of balance. I am one of them. As an example, I have not done drugs, I can drink alcohol responsibly, and I don't smoke. They just don't "do" it for me. But games........ oh boy. I am married to a beautiful wife, and have three children, and I have fallen - fell, sorry - into the trap of having my children in bed by a certain time so I can go and play. I am shamed to admit this. The truth is it takes effort to grow a garden and pull out the weeds, and I expect that if I don't square away my problems with this game, my garden (family) will suffer - maybe not today, but it is inevitable. I need help. I am finding my problem with this game is bigger than me, and I need to reach out. Thats how I ended up here. John I need to point out that a lot of posts - and my own story - began with something like "We were fine, then along came Wow"...... My wife and I got into the game because some of our friends were. We didn't need to - it just seemed like a good idea. We had fun for the first few months. But it was a bit like someone offering a drink to a would-be alcoholic - for most people, the drink would be a problem, but for a few.... And yes, it can be agued that if you cut off this Medusa's head another will grow in it's place, as it does not fix the cause of the problem..... but in my experience Wow is designed to be captivating, just as tobbacco was designed to be (once upon a time) socially acceptable but addictive. What I am saying is that it is easy to fall into this game than get out of it, for many people - no matter how appealing the real world may be, Wow is designed to try and be MORE appealing - Blizzard's employees get paid for this, it's their job. You might be a player who has no problem with this game, and can balance your social life and commitments without a problem, and thats okay - that will let you enjoy the game. I am also asssuming that, coming from this point of view, you might find it difficult to see that it is not just Lex's problem. But if 50 hours of work is too much, surely 50 hours of Wow is also too much. My view is that there are a lot of crack addicts out there - with families that need them - who need a friend to come over and, ignoring the protests, flush their stash down the toilet. If the answer is to just be more interesting than the crack, maybe we can get all the kids to be more interesting too so their Dads and Mums will spend time with them, whadda ya reckon? No, me and my fellow addicts need to ask for some help and get over this. Rick Wed, 04 Jun 2008 03:04:12 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#76b5f82c-d729-4591-b6c8-99b0b7fa0c33 Richard 2008-06-04T03:04:12Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#ac37b226-9442-4bf0-a292-d286231528a5 Judging by the date of your post, you've had your baby, and hopefully your husband is distracted sufficiently from the game by being a father that you're having less of a problem now, but I wanted to comment on your post anyway. Your problem isn't warcraft. Warcraft is a symptom of your (very common) problem. Sometimes the symptom is other women, or drinking, or staying out late with his buddies, but they're the symptom not the problem. In a way, you should be glad the symptom wasn't something dangerous or irreconcilable. The crux of your problem is in your own post: "I worked out that of the 168 hours in a week he spends about 50 hours a week at work - he is a general manager & does work very hard, there is no denying that. He would spend about 42 hours sleeping, atleast 5 hours driving to & from work, & get this 50 hours of Wow... that leaves 5-8 hours for everything else, cleaning, shopping, watching his tv shows - battlestar galactica & spending time with me!!!!" A person needs to spend about a third of their time on responsibilities, a third on sleep, and a third on 'other' stuff. They'll make excuses to get to this balance or they'll burnout or succumb to anxiety. He's working too many hours, for one.. But the other problem seems to be that he considers time with you to be a "responsibility" and not a privilege. I'm not privy to the interactions in your relationship, so I can't say why, but if it feels like work for him to be with you, and he's already been at actual work for 50 hours, he's going to do something else when he comes home. That's the problem you should be focusing on fixing. I don't know how you fix it, but it'll at least help if you're working on the problem rather than the symptom. If you take away the game without fixing the problem, he'll just resent you. That won't end well. Mon, 02 Jun 2008 22:50:57 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#ac37b226-9442-4bf0-a292-d286231528a5 John 2008-06-02T22:50:57Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#65493212-9cd9-4fd5-ab34-e84cd1bf1841 I just want to let you know i'm going through the same thing!!! i was reading what you wrote and felt like i wrote it, it made me want to cry! i'm 6 months pregnant with our second son, and my husband has been playing for a year now. i cant take it anymore we're 3yrs married this year and we're talking about call our marriage, over! i feel like i dont even know him...he's made "friends" on there that he talks to more then me and one of the players he plays with is this girl, that he says is so funny and cool. he chat with the other guys about her. i feel so stupid for letting it come to this point.... i'm sitting in my room and can here him and her and the others having a good 'o time. I cant live like this. well if you need someone to talk to...i know how you feel and it hasnt gotten better for us it's just keeps getting worse. sadly i'm losing my love for my husband over WOW Fri, 25 Apr 2008 07:30:32 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#65493212-9cd9-4fd5-ab34-e84cd1bf1841 Angie 2008-04-25T07:30:32Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#1ceca83e-9515-41e3-9818-c43a2b1017ef Hi Lex, I feel for you so much. I had a baby three years ago in May 2005. He's so wonderful! His name is Will. My husband didn't play yet then, but he's totally addicted now. I just wanted to give some advice about Sara's comments about unplugging his computer. Be careful...I don't know your husband at all, obviously, but you being pregnant puts you at a much greater risk for domestic violence and abuse. If he has a bad temper, you could be putting yourself and your baby at risk. I would try to talk to him in a neutral and safe setting. You are about to experience the most amazing time in your life...motherhood. I hope he's there to experience it with you. Good luck, dear. Cathy Mon, 21 Apr 2008 05:20:21 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#1ceca83e-9515-41e3-9818-c43a2b1017ef Cathy 2008-04-21T05:20:21Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#28b3ea7b-b889-4557-9733-e8f486529823 i hate the game too. my husband plays at least 25 hours a week. those are just the hours i know about. how much time does he spend with me or our children? i guarantee it is less than 25 hours a week. i used to think of him as being interesting and ambitious. now i just think he is a loser. he used to run and exercise and read and watch sports. he rarely does any of those things anymore. if we didn't have 2 kids, i would seriously want to leave. he talks about the game like it is real. i don't want to hear about it. he talks about his guild like they are actually his friends. he doesn't try to have any kind of real life social activities. when our son was born he got 2 weeks off of work to spend with the family. i thought he would take care of me or spend time with the new baby or our daughter. not so much, mostly he just played the game. like i said, loser. sorry for you situation. you are not alone! Sun, 06 Apr 2008 21:22:34 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#28b3ea7b-b889-4557-9733-e8f486529823 Angela 2008-04-06T21:22:34Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#8b9bf24f-82a2-41c2-bacd-e1be117c62eb Lex, How is everything going? I noticed your post was back in April so you must be a mum now. Congratulations! I am Australian too and had a baby girl in May (so she's now 7 mths +). My husband was getting into WoW about 2 months before she was born. I wish he never had. Some friends of ours told us about it and we started playing together, but I gave up after our baby was born, not only because I had better things to do with my time but because I was so frustrated with my husband spending so much time on the game, instead of with our baby. I am at the pc now at 12.37am in the morning when I should be sleeping as I'm really sad about it. My husband doesn't think he has a problem. Every time I complain, he says, "I've nearly finished the game", but this has gone on for months now so I don't believe him. The other night he said to me 'I feel so alone' - well, hello, of course you would feel so alone if you've been so involved with the game that he barely has time to cuddle our daughter. His 'friends' are his on-line friends. I wish he would come into the real world sometime which has so much to offer. Let me know how you are going, Michelle Thu, 20 Dec 2007 13:42:24 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#8b9bf24f-82a2-41c2-bacd-e1be117c62eb Michelle 2007-12-20T13:42:24Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#58a699d7-5bc3-4959-919e-73feb58740ad Hi Windy, I think your husbands problem is different than others. It's hard to judge from one post but I don't think he's trying to escape anything, I just think he doesn't see how much time he plays or how much it's hurting you and the family. If you can, sit down with him and write out a schedule. This schedule will first show what you currently do each day of the week. You can also put down the costs is you like. This may help him quantify how much time he is unavailable. Then see if you can work with him to find a schedule where he can play and when he should spend time with the family. If he is in a guild there are probably certain days and times the group works together and they'll need him. Give him those times, but in turn he has to give up others untill you have a 50:50 split of his free time family and game. It's a start but if you can get it it'll be progress. Asking him to play less without quantifying it won't get you anywhere. Reguarding his comment it's only one problm, show him how it's more than that. It's a financial problem, it's a health problem, it's a child problem, it's a relationship problem, and it's a social problem. Remind him that the people in the game, the avatars are not the players. Every time I see a totally decked out player who honestly looks really cool, I tell myself that has to be one of the biggest loosers out there. Have you seen the south park warcraft episode? It demonstrates my point by showing the looser. I don't know, maybee if you show him that perspective he'l relent to play it as a casual game and not an obcession. I've been playing for about a year and a half casually and I am still enjoying myself. I play less than 2 hours a week. Good Luck Cody Mon, 24 Sep 2007 20:49:16 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#58a699d7-5bc3-4959-919e-73feb58740ad Cody 2007-09-24T20:49:16Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#6a16a8eb-b376-4c2c-9d34-58c3329b7fd7 I have to say it is nice to see other people hate this game as much as I do!! My husband found this game about a year ago and our lives have never been the same. We have been married for 10 years and have 3 wonderful children. It seems as if he is ready to throw away everything for this game. I don't care if he plays a little bit, I tell him that all the time! What I do care about is he comes home from work around 6:00 and the kids go to bed at 8:00 (they are ages 6,4, & 2)! That gives him 2 little precious hours to spend with the children and he would rather play this game. If I leave to go to the store he gets on the computer as soon as the door shuts and all shit hits the fan if a kid needs him for something. If the kids are not in bed at 8:00 sharp he get really mad. On his lunch break he goes to an internet cafe and plays this stupid game. That's $20.00/week for lunch time fun!!!!! This weekend we cleaned out the garage. When 7:00 came around he got really angry because it he knew we would not be finished by 8:00. I would not have a problem with him playing this game if he would do it for 2 hours a night. But he can not seem to stop. Once he turns on the game he is stuck. It's like crack. My husband the video game crack addict! I have begged and pleaded for him to stop playing as much. Never have I said "I don't want you to play" I just say "I want you to play less." I think I am being fair. He gets to play at lunch, plus 2 hours a night and then the weekends he can play all night long. I am a child of divorce and promised myself I would never ever put my own children through the same hurt I have been through. I can't live like this anymore. I can not be with a man who values a game more than me and the children. My children deserve more than this and I do to. It just tears me apart to know a video game, a stupid game could ruin the life of 5 people. I think it would be easier to understand if it were drugs or alcohol. I am scared to tell him goodbye. I have no money, no place to go and no one who will understand. I don't want to hurt my kids, I want them to have a good life but I just can't do this anymore. I can not continue to plan my life around a video game! He told me lastnight, "we have a great family and just this one little problem" I don't see it as a little problem I have to say it is enormous like the Colorado Rocky Mountians setting in our family room. Mon, 24 Sep 2007 14:22:10 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#6a16a8eb-b376-4c2c-9d34-58c3329b7fd7 Windy 2007-09-24T14:22:10Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#b29686b2-10b9-41c6-8148-dcd6e3e54bdd I understand completely I have been with my partner for 2 years. At first it was just Counter strike source that he was playing and I was playing that too because that was fun... but then i got bored with it and stopped. He wanted WOW so stupid me bought it for him.... and ive regretted that ever since. Ive tried playing it and i got to like level 12 but then i just got so bored... i dont know how they can sit there and play for hours on end. He neglects me and when we have his daughter every second weekend( thats only 4 nights a month) he plays the fucking game all day and all night, only breaking when I literally BEG him to take her somewhere or give her a bath. Even then its a hassle for him to do that!!!. I am left to entertain HIS 7 year old daughter. She goes home and tells her mum that "daddy plays his computer all the time". I cop an earful from her mother, with her threatening to not let him see her. I dont know how to make him stop. hes so fucking stubborn and pig headed. He never compliments me anymore, complains about stuff I cook, looks bored when we go out, rushes home to play wow. I clean, I cook, I care for HIS offspring when she is here, I do the maintenance to the house outside, i feed the animals, i clean up after the animals, i do the washing, i do the ironing, i fold the clothes, i keep the bedrooms tidy, i clean the bedsheets when they get dirty.... i just dont know what to do. I cry all the time but he just does not get it... im not going to give him an ultimatem because I dont do ultimatems but i just want this to stop. its getting so bad that i can hardly say "I love you" anymore because replies from him come out like a grunt. He speaks to other females on the game as well as his friends who he knows in person.... I mean Im glad hes not at the pub or anything but if he was then I would be with him because I love going to the pub and socialising with friends. But even conversations are filled with WOW now.... Our relationship is strained, we hardly talk anymore. we dont make out anymore. he hardly ever kisses me passionately like he used to. I go to bed and beg him to come to bed and he says "shortly" and shortly turns into about 2 hours, so I am asleep by the time he comes to bed. Then he wants to do it and im like.. asleep. I just want this horrid horrid stuff to stop. Our relationship was perfect before wow came along. I kick myself for buying it for him. He spends money on the stupid game. For my 21st birthday(A BIG ONE AT THAT) he gave me a card!. A card! thats it! a 21st birthday and the person who supposedly loves you the most gives you a card!.... i dont want to leave him because i love him. and his daughter loves me to death!! but i dont know what to do to make him cut down.... we never go anywhere, my weekends are consumed with making sure things are in order before having to go back to work... i mean he doesnt like me going out to pubs and clubs, and thinks that im satisfied just staying home. what a crock of shit. anyways im almost in tears now so i better go. any support would be appreciated. thanks heaps for letting me vent Thu, 30 Aug 2007 09:34:16 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#b29686b2-10b9-41c6-8148-dcd6e3e54bdd cat 2007-08-30T09:34:16Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#25d0a61e-5da5-4102-bfb8-6a68bb387e21 Because you remembered what a sweet person he was when he wasn't addicted to WOW, and still hope that that same person will come back. My husband is a completely different person when he's addicted to a game. It's like nothing else matter to him any more. Instead of setting a time limit on the game, he sets a time limit on the amount of time he's going to spend with me. How ridiculous! Maybe he should have called 1800-lovechicks every night to get some social interaction for an hour! Sun, 19 Aug 2007 01:31:18 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#25d0a61e-5da5-4102-bfb8-6a68bb387e21 Vicki 2007-08-19T01:31:18Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#9ef4334a-0197-4474-b556-87bf01e96b59 I can understand how you feel lex. My husband has threated divorce over this game. Do you hear me?? DIVORCE! He loved the game more than me. And the friggin friendships! They drive me crazy. He once stayed up all night talking to this woman about her life and where were my son and I? in bed asleep. I woke up enraged because he really wasn't playing he was starting to cross the line. He still plays this game,and I understand the hurt. I sit a lot quietly and I see him not fulfilling some obligations for this game and I try to remind him that is this game really that important. He prefers this game over his mom and family and a lot of times me and my son. And when we bother him at the wrong time, it's a bunch a BS i get about it. So, yeah I understand you. I want the game to die. Will blizzard, just take their fat pockets and die already. They are rich. the price of the game plus the monthly pay rate, I have had enough! That money cold have been spent in other ways. Not to mention the fake gold he has bought and wants to buy. Every conversation, WOW is brought up and now. I am so fed up with it. Wed, 30 May 2007 21:16:58 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#9ef4334a-0197-4474-b556-87bf01e96b59 Pinky 2007-05-30T21:16:58Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#3cacf02d-e432-41cd-b6ab-65ae8295fc78 Hi Lex I'm a recovering WoW addict. I'm trying to stay clean but having a bit of a hard time at the moment. That is just to give you a bit of backround where I'm coming from. Now about your questions, confronting him & demanding he get off the game may cause a break between you. He may resent you for "nagging" at him and cause more distance between you. It depends how deep he is in. The game is very insidious, the addiction very real and can change even someone's personality. Ultimately you have your own decision whether you are willing to live with it or not. If not confront him forcefully or leave him or both (kids make this harder of course). If you are then I would say wait it out as best you can. Some players eventually burnout and kick the habit. I can guaranty he realises the negative effects the game is having on his real life and on some level resents the game for it. He will either "hit rock bottom" (which is different for every person) or become traped in a downward spiral of escapism. Trying to make him quit the game with "interventions" may work or it may not, it depends how hooked he is on the game. If it doesn't work this will be very destructive to your relationship. You could try to play the game aswell but I don't recomend it, it could turn out to be a very self-destructive move. If you want to understand what he is going through a bit better this site might help. It has alot of stories of people going through similar situations and some first hand accounts of people addiction to WoW and other games. http://news.com.com/5208-1040_3-0.html?forumID=1&threadID=2725&start=0 Good luck! I hope things work out for you. Wed, 30 May 2007 11:56:53 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#3cacf02d-e432-41cd-b6ab-65ae8295fc78 Joe 2007-05-30T11:56:53Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#458f6879-56ad-4717-aad9-834f18882874 my dad plays world of warcraft all the time. as soon as he comes from work he goes straight to the computer. I have broken my laptop just so he would stop playing it. then he put it on his computer and started playing it. Its horrible! I wish I could tell you what to do. maybe once you figure it out you can tell me lol. good luck. Sat, 26 May 2007 21:44:57 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#458f6879-56ad-4717-aad9-834f18882874 brook 2007-05-26T21:44:57Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#56c5294d-9e11-460b-85ac-c37e2dd5a827 I thank you for sharing this story. I browsed through these pages a long time ago and read it, but I wasn't a member of tribe.net. It really got me thinking about my relationship and whether or not I'd still want to be with my boyfriend at the risk of being pregnant and neglected. I completely understand what you're talking about, the guild commitment thing. My bf was a guild leader and would always have this, air of importance in WoW when I was with him. It's like I couldn't ask him to spend less time on it because it was so important. This last argument, he finally realized how much it was hurting me and how much it made me resent him. Since then, he's finding other games that take up less time but still allow for friendship. I know you're married so the stakes are different... but from my small experience, you can't be afraid to leave someone if they're hurting you. Picture having your baby, and having the kid neglected because he has to kill some programmed pixel monster to keep his online friends happy. Also, I don't know how Australian laws are, but here we have child support. You can leave him and still get his financial support for the baby. I lost all of my friends when I started dating my boyfriend, and I refuse to go to my family because that's a hell in itself. But maybe you have some friends or family that can attend to you whink he's being a jerk. You're a lot more emotionally sensitive now that you're pregnant, so you need someone to attend to your needs. Mon, 21 May 2007 13:37:47 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#56c5294d-9e11-460b-85ac-c37e2dd5a827 PJ 2007-05-21T13:37:47Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#cd1a6937-7e03-438a-9543-8f6bf03abcf6 You are right, Josh, the people in this little forum don't know how to do anything right. Why don't you just unplug the computer for a while? How about not blaming the game? The game isn't the problem, it is either the wife, or the husband, not the game. The game is just a game... Sat, 28 Apr 2007 17:31:09 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#cd1a6937-7e03-438a-9543-8f6bf03abcf6 Andrew 2007-04-28T17:31:09Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#c3df445a-284d-4eed-9ff2-0122e5a35db1 I'm sorry, but I really don't get this... You know someone is addicted to something and probably seems more interested in it than you , but you still continue the relationship and get mad or hurt when they won't stop playing? You say that you're in love with them, but how can you be in love someone that values a game more than you, it just blows my mind. Sat, 28 Apr 2007 13:39:25 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#c3df445a-284d-4eed-9ff2-0122e5a35db1 jason 2007-04-28T13:39:25Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#337ecd98-7b72-4f78-9d13-61f98d761f16 I'm sorry, but I really don't get this... You know someone is addicted to something and probably seems more interested in it than you , but you still continue the relationship and get mad when or hurt when they won't stop playing? You say that your in love with them, but how can you be in love someone that values a game more than you, it just blows my mind. Sat, 28 Apr 2007 13:25:57 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#337ecd98-7b72-4f78-9d13-61f98d761f16 jason 2007-04-28T13:25:57Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#7bfdff36-951d-4657-9ae9-02cade8ddda9 Sara, I am glad that this method has worked for you, but I am afraid it could have the opposite results on other addicted persons. My boyfriend for example would get furious if I ever told him to choose between me and wow, cause it would hurt his ego and it would make me look like a dictator who's trying to manipulate him and oppress him. I strongly believe he would chose wow over me (sad huh?), without giving it much thought, just because of the ego matter. Lex, you should definitely talk to him and tell him the things you wrote here. My opinion is not to threat him (at least at this point) with leaving, just explain to him what wow has done to your relationship and then you will see what happens. Josh, I really hope it's not too late for your marriage, but let me ask you something: is it true that she didn't tell you how she felt? Or did you choose not to listen? My boyfriend does that, I mean on one hand he says he will try to see me more and organize his time and on the other hand he says that there's no problem(!!!!) and that someone can play as long as they like if it makes them happy, so I don't think he has realized the significance of the problem. Anyway, good luck guys and please let us know if there is any progress... Thu, 12 Apr 2007 23:16:34 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#7bfdff36-951d-4657-9ae9-02cade8ddda9 Gina 2007-04-12T23:16:34Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#6b2a3a84-d0e9-486a-b2c1-09ff0186370b I know how you feel, and I wanted to give you some advice. It might sound harsh, but it resolved a huge issue in my relationship, and actually set a new tone. I asked my boyfriend to get off of the computer. We have an agreement, he plays every Monday night and every other Wednesday night. It was Thursday and he claimed he was helping his little brother out. It really was a form of manipulation because under the guise of helping his brother, he was playing. Getting back, I asked him a second time to get off the computer, and he refused. I asked him one last time, and even used the word poitely, and he threw it back and said politely, no. Without another word, I walked to the modem and pulled the plug. He was livid, said he was going to leave and go back to his parents house!!! Would you believe he thought about giving up our relationship because of a stupid computer game? I let him rant, he even called his father and asked him if he could go back. The old man thankfully told him he would have to discuss it with his mom. About an hour later he had calmed down and we talked about it, with the computer still unplugged. He really is trying to make an effort now, but it took a lot of talking and some compromise. I think he is seriously trying to ween himself completely off of the computer. For the sake of your child, I think you should walk over to the computer and just unplug it. If he leaves, then is it really worth continuing to suffer? If he stays, then perhaps it will demonstrate that you are not a nagging wife, but someone who cares enough about him and your marriage to take bold steps. Mon, 09 Apr 2007 19:09:17 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#6b2a3a84-d0e9-486a-b2c1-09ff0186370b Sara 2007-04-09T19:09:17Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#b0f91aa2-1593-4355-8ef6-e91a1e0d84ea Give him a choice. You or the game. Tell him exactly how you feel, about the lonely nights crying, about how his ignoring you and neglect is effecting you. If he does not do that, then leave. Stay with your parents or a friend for a week and see if he comes around. Show him what could happen if he keeps this sort of activity up. Also ask him about how the pregnancy is making him feel. You may be surprised at the answer. It would be my guess that he is scared out of his mind at the thought of fatherhood. He is also probably feeling trapped in a sense that he thinks his freedom has been stripped away. He may be playing the game so much to make things "ok" for himself. When in reality he is destroying the relationship with the person he most likely cares for most in the world. I know this because I was there, I was him. When my wife and I first started dating things were great. We were in love and cared deeply for each other. One day I asked her to marry me because I wanted to be with her for the rest of my life. Two weeks later we found out she was pregnant. I was scared to death. I was still going to school, we had known each other less than a year, and now I had all this other responsibility on top of it. I had always played video games, but I started throwing myself into them. Leaving my wife home alone for many nights in a row at a time. She went through the same thing you are right now. She still loved me but she also really resented me. I wish she had told me about the lonely nights or or all the tears she shed. I wish she had told me sooner "the game or her"....................... I wish I still had my wife. You see our relationship never quite recovered from it. I kept up the same behaviors for years afterward and she never truly told me how she felt... until it was to late. She had breakdowns now and again and I would try to be better for some time, but when I was then she would not have it in her to try herself. Just recently I found out just how she had felt, but she had kept it to herself for so long that she was no longer in love with me. She sat me down one night and told me. The next day I canceled my subscription and I have not played since. I became the perfect husband, but it was far to little and way to late. Last week my wife told me she wanted a divorce. Our marriage is over and I will soon lose not only my wife, but most likely my child as well. It's a regret I will carry with me for the rest of my life. On top of it, I deploy to Iraq in two months, which I will be doing alone and with no emotional support from her. Please, if you still love him, find the courage to do what you have to to make him see the error in his ways. Hell, show him this post if you want. Make sure he knows what it is that he is doing and how he stands to lose so much. If you want, you can even give him my AIM if either of you want to talk to someone who has been through it. I know that sounds odd, but I feel really strongly about doing what I can to help others in the situation I have lived through. My AIM account is Bluerazer. I hope things get better for you and maybe this post helped, take care. Sat, 07 Apr 2007 21:51:37 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#b0f91aa2-1593-4355-8ef6-e91a1e0d84ea Josh 2007-04-07T21:51:37Z http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#df14afcc-4f32-48c7-9454-fc1dbeab6156 Hi Everyone..... This is my first post as I just joined tonight (I am Australian). I decided I'd had enough of the game & googled "i hate warcraft" to see what it came up with & I found this site & joined right away!! I totally emphasize with all of you. My life is a mess because my husband of one year is addicted to WoW. When we first got together everything was wonderful but when I moved in with him I discovered that he played WoW almost every night, something he had neglected to tell me. Over the last 18 months as time has gone on he has become truly addicted to the game. What makes things worse for me is that I'm 8 months pregnant & I am having to spend the days at home alone as I haven't been well & then when he gets home at night he is always on his game & all weekend, so I am getting basically no social interaction at all at the moment & I have never felt so lonely or unhappy in my life... isn't pregnancy meant to be exciting & wonderful??? I'm not sure he even wants this baby now as it's going to interfere with his gaming. You know a couple of weeks ago I collapsed on the floor whilst he was playing, he jumped up to help me, got me to my feet, dragged me to the couch & told me to stay there & not move until he could get off the game!!!! Can you believe that?? I collapsed again last week & had to go to hospital for the night. He did come with me but he had to make sure he let all the people in his Guild know he wouldn't be there & then chatted to some on the phone in my hospital room. You would think it's a job or something. The thing I really hate about the game is that you can't just get on there & do your own thing, play for an hour or so, all these raids he does take hours & hours & they plan out their raids weeks in advance & so he feels "committed" to the Guild. Whatever.... Sure as hell isn't committed to me. You know, I bet he'll be talking to people on the phone whilst I'm giving birth & resenting having to be there with me rather than playing Wow. I did some calculations the other day. I worked out that of the 168 hours in a week he spends about 50 hours a week at work - he is a general manager & does work very hard, there is no denying that. He would spend about 42 hours sleeping, atleast 5 hours driving to & from work, & get this 50 hours of Wow... that leaves 5-8 hours for everything else, cleaning, shopping, watching his tv shows - battlestar galactica & spending time with me!!!! Maybe I get about 2 hours a week & even then I feel that it's because he feels he has to, not because he wants to. He wonders why I feel unloved. I totally understand that he has a stressful job & that he needs time to himself & time to destress, but I think there's a limit. He may as well have said his vows to his computer not to me, I think he'd be far happier if he was married to it than to me. I have tried everything I can think of to try to get around this problem. I have even created my own character & tried to enjoy the game myself so we can play together, but running round killing stuff is just not my thing. I have spoken to him about & each time he says he'll cut back, he does for maybe a week, then it is back into his old ways. He has made alot of friends in his Guild & I think he's far more interested in chatting to them than he is in talking to me. He has become so withdrawn too. He barely speaks to me anymore, & doesn't share anything about his life with me anymore. & he always says to me "wouldn't you rather I be home playing games, than up the pub getting pissed everynight, atleast you know where I am"..... he is so insensitive. Now most times I bring it up he just gets annoyed with me & I don't wanna make him angry coz I'm scared he'll leave or something. It makes things hard now that we are married otherwise, despite the fact that for some strange reason I love him so much, I think I would have left by now. But the baby just complicates things even more. I don't want my little boy growing up without a Mum & a Dad who love each other & are together. & if I was to leave I have nowhere to go anyway & as it is, he provides all the finances. Sorry for rambling on, but I am so depressed & upset, crying every night, feeling very unwell due to this pregnancy & am so lonely coz of this awful game. I don't know what I can do & am so confused about things. I feel I'm trapped in this cycle & that I should just get used to it coz it seems like it will never end. Terrible thing is - I can't live without him, but I find it very hard living with him. Thanks guys..... Alexis Sat, 07 Apr 2007 02:29:06 GMT http://ihateWOW.tribe.net/thread/086fb43d-a021-46ef-9e9d-a25bad232dec#df14afcc-4f32-48c7-9454-fc1dbeab6156 Lex 2007-04-07T02:29:06Z