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I've only been with my boyfriend about four months, and I knew he was into WoW before I met him. I just never really knew what it was or the extent of his obsession. He's also into Dungeons & Dragons and Renaissance Fairs and basically anything escapist. I am not. At first I thought it was cute. No, being into Q-bert or Grand Theft Auto is cute, WoW is just sad.
While he continuously assures me he is very much into our relationship, he does so only when I have his undivided attention and I am pressing him to display an interest. In his own time he shows absolutely no interest and makes no gestures and I couldn't really figure out why. I thought maybe he was just clueless, maybe he was absent minded, then I noticed a trend. He would generally spend Saturday nights at my place, and although Sunday is our mutual day off, he would always rush home.
After three weeks of pushing him to show a genuine interest in our relationship, yesterday I gave him what will most likely be his last chance. I wanted him to spend his day off with me - go for a walk, sit in the park, go to a museum, SOMETHING three dimensional that we both could share. Not only did he not go for it, he couldn't understand why a couple should want to spend their mutual day off together. He thought he should be able to do his "own thing". We do our own thing all the time, but if I'm going to be in a relationship I'd like to get to know my boyfriend.
Instead of spending the day together we rushed through lunch and then he wanted to go home. I pretty much laid out my feelings then and there, and while I didn't address WoW specifically, I told him how absurd it was that he was choosing an afternoon alone at home over the person he won't see for another week. I could sense his agitation, but not over my comments, over the game awaiting him at home. He couldn't wait to get on the subway.
He could have salvaged the relationship he claims to cherish, all he had to do was compromise one Sunday for me. I essentially told him it was over, I was done, that I didn't want to date him anymore unless he was willing to make a gesture. And on the brink of breaking up, he rushed me through the last part of the conversation, told me to sleep on it, and rushed home to play WoW. He chose WoW over potentially saving his relationship. I can compete for attention with family and friends but I'm not going to be blown off for a video game.
While he continuously assures me he is very much into our relationship, he does so only when I have his undivided attention and I am pressing him to display an interest. In his own time he shows absolutely no interest and makes no gestures and I couldn't really figure out why. I thought maybe he was just clueless, maybe he was absent minded, then I noticed a trend. He would generally spend Saturday nights at my place, and although Sunday is our mutual day off, he would always rush home.
After three weeks of pushing him to show a genuine interest in our relationship, yesterday I gave him what will most likely be his last chance. I wanted him to spend his day off with me - go for a walk, sit in the park, go to a museum, SOMETHING three dimensional that we both could share. Not only did he not go for it, he couldn't understand why a couple should want to spend their mutual day off together. He thought he should be able to do his "own thing". We do our own thing all the time, but if I'm going to be in a relationship I'd like to get to know my boyfriend.
Instead of spending the day together we rushed through lunch and then he wanted to go home. I pretty much laid out my feelings then and there, and while I didn't address WoW specifically, I told him how absurd it was that he was choosing an afternoon alone at home over the person he won't see for another week. I could sense his agitation, but not over my comments, over the game awaiting him at home. He couldn't wait to get on the subway.
He could have salvaged the relationship he claims to cherish, all he had to do was compromise one Sunday for me. I essentially told him it was over, I was done, that I didn't want to date him anymore unless he was willing to make a gesture. And on the brink of breaking up, he rushed me through the last part of the conversation, told me to sleep on it, and rushed home to play WoW. He chose WoW over potentially saving his relationship. I can compete for attention with family and friends but I'm not going to be blown off for a video game.
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